Give yourself a break!

Apparently some lad got his nose bitten off in Havanas Tuesday night. That is what has inspired this latest entry. Now I don’t by any means doubt the phenomenal Chinnese whispers that surrounds this piece of news and I have no idea, nor do I want to know, the reasons behind this, but it does make you think about the injuries that one endures on a night of painting the town all sorts of red. Blood red if you will… (Too soon?)

Students in general are a mighty resilient bunch. I mean look at us go! The bruises, scrapes and bumps we awake with are like medals of honour that are then paraded in front of our troops of friends in a bid to see who’s got the worse. How having the dodgiest looking bruise is seen as a form of accomplishment I don’t know, but heck what do I care…I’m great at it!!!

It’s amazing to think how ruthlessly cruel to our bodies we really are. Isn’t it bad enough we poison it from the inside out with concoctions of wine and tequila before we even consider going out. Why must we decorate it with gapping wounds too? But sure we do for we are students, we get joy from jumping around like mad ejitts and think downing a bottle of Buckfast constitutes as a casual drink, sure it’s not wonder we get hurt so often. And boy do we think it’s funny when people get hurt. Perhaps its some physiological trait deriving from our survival of the fittest notions but we really love it when others get hurt. Many a night spent around the Hillbilly’s fountain has been spent watching whichever Corkonian Tarzan has climbed said fountain waiting for him to fall over. Normally we hide our secret hopes of him falling very well though and cover it with chants of ‘FALL FALL FALL!’. Perhaps subtlety is not our strong point.

Doesn't quiet have the same effect when his name is Seamus from Ballyvourney

On the bright side it matched my nail polish...

On a personal level I feel I have accomplished a lot to help aid the ever struggling health professionals of the world clocking up an impressive repertoire of broken toes, ankles and collerbones. And for all the downs of falling down, it does have its ups too; those crutches lying along side my bed are great for reaching the cardigans I keep high up on my closet and that sling of mine also acted as a handy aid for sneaking cheeky naggins into bars. See its fun to be innovative with injuries! My most recent of injuries treated me to a sexy cast to my knee for a few weeks, and although it forced me to arrive to college panting and sweating and I may have even struggled through a digital marketing presentation whilst standing only on one foot to only go to A+E immediately after (Yes Carol, that is commitment right there.) it does have it’s ups. The following weekend I went on a weekend away with UCC Surf Club and hey when you have surfers offering to carry you everywhere…it would be rude to say no! :)

So why do we do it to ourselves? Why not just stay in and read a bloody book rather than jumping on tables and riding around in trolleys? Who knows? Perhaps it’s a mating call of sorts. He who attracts the most attention via injuries gets the most student nurses numbers. Hey, if it works for you than why not! Hmmmmmm I wonder if I work on my damsel in distress act I might get me a doctor? Sure I'll a crack at it (get it...like a cracked bone...oh I'm too much!) 

And for the record this complete and utter reckless treatment of our bodies in not something specifically occurring in the regions of Cork. It’s not like theirs something in the water around here (If anything it would be the substitution of water with vodka that may be a cause..) but it is a world wide activity. The group ‘Unknown Drunken Injuries’ on Facebook has 1,181,655 fans. Yes child rejoice for you are not alone! And when I say rejoice I mean smile to yourself or at most give your self a subtle clap on the back…for GODS SAKE DON’T GO ON THE LASH!!!

But you're probably going to ignore my advice continue the adding of scars to your collection. Well if thats the case here's a little tune to get you through tomorrow morning. (I personally enjoy the 'I increasingly think I broke my leg'.) http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1924835