Transport: What a difference a day makes.

The transportation system is something on which we rely. It does more than just take us from A to B, but instead takes us from A to iBiza and C to Donegal whilst ensuring one need not put a foot on the ground in the process. Yes it is true the transportation system has evolved wonderfully and with its timetable precision apps, ‘when’s my bus’ texts and online book-ins this system has used social media and it’s marketing to it’s fullest to ensure service is of only the highest quality. One would have to be an idiot to complicate their journey. This is where I come in. Hi I’m Paula and I’m a traveling idiot.

It is true I do suffer from the idiotic gene in most aspects of my life, but its symptoms show up stronger in some areas than others. These areas include remembering names, pronunciation of words, knowing when jokes are inappropriate and, of course, transporting myself from A to B. Now I’m not putting full blame of the latter personal fault on the transportation system itself, I am very much to blame. Even in walking from A to B I will inevitably be distracted by talking to companions, stopping for chocolate and/or seeing something shiny. Transport is difficult for the easily distracted.

In regards to commercial transport I have, in the space of a day, lost faith in any humanity behind their systems. Ok, that is a bit extreme but I did have a terrible day. So for all the ‘pleasant journey’ Bus Eireann adverts and Air Coach’s offers of a luxurious service all I can think is what a load of…(*must not use offensive language)….lies. Yes they lie. Now as a Marketing Major I understand that these companies do not lie in spite of the consumer and it is an integral part of their job to communicate their company as positively as possible, but with services so shocking I struggle to see how their marketing managers manage this. So yes what a difference a day makes…

…one Friday morning I awoke happily in anticipation for the trip that lay ahead of me. Granted, I also awoke with feelings of unease (and if you read the previous blog, which was based on the previous night you will understand why) but mostly feelings of excitement. I was traveling to Edinburgh for a friend’s birthday and was terribly excited. There were some downfalls in my trip however which were as follows:

1)      Cork flights were too expensive so I had to fly from Dublin.

2)      I was traveling alone.

3)      I am an idiot (see above paragraphs)

4)      I was injured. (I’m actually writing this blog from an A&E waiting room).

The plan was simple.

·              Get myself to the aircoach stop (on the other side of the city) for 13:00 hrs.

·              Take bus to Dublin airport.

·              Have 2 and a half hours spare time prior to flight for ‘just in case’.

·              Don’t be an idiot.

·              Don’t be injured.

Immediately I had failed two parts of the plan. Things weren’t looking so great. So yes as I was suffering with a broken foot, the forty or so minute walk to the coach stop didn’t seem the most tempting. What would one do in such a situation? Get a city centre bus perhaps? Not in Cork would you dare do such a thing. Knowing far too well of Cork City center bus policy of arriving every 15 minutes (The policy is that they don’t have one.) walking was really the only option. It turned out to be the right option as not one bus passed me on my route…thus meaning I’d still be waiting at that bus-stop now….14 days later. That’s strike one transportation system.

Three Strikes and you're out.

As I almost arrive at my stop (in tremendous pain) to get the aircoach what does it do as I am seconds from the bus stop but drive off. I attempt to run after the bus but with a broken foot this proves difficult. I’ve missed my bus because it wouldn’t stop for the cripple. Thanks. I really appreciate it. That’s strike two.

Distraught from this I make my way to Bus Eireann’s station and am there for about 13:03 and the 13:00 bus was gone. For the first time in history the bus had left on time. The one time I need it. Brilliant. (At this stage I hope you’re realizing how much I dislike transport) Much time is spent at this station deciding where to go next, whether wait for the next bus, catch a different flight or the next train. I opt for the train and make my merry way to Cork’s train station. Oh did I type merry? I meant to say miserable, yes quite miserable. So miserable to say if somebody stopped me to ask the time/support a charity/sign a petition I would have headbutted them. No exaggeration, just a swift headbutt and continued on limping away. That gives you an idea of the misery the transportation system here inflicts on its customers.

What next? Oh yes the train. So I made the 13:30 Dublin train…or so I thought. Whilst my laser card is in the machine processing the transaction the women behind the counter announces, with no remorse whatsoever, ‘oh too late’ and the intercom blows its whistle indicating doors were locked. Brilliant. Missed that train by roughly 30 seconds. Strike three.

This doesn't even do the queue length justice

So I get the next train and catch an airlink from Hueston Station to the airport. At this stage I am feeling more relaxed, I still had an hour and a half to make it to my boarding gate. Soon I’d be eating fudge and looking at men in kilts, all was good in the world. This was until the DAA and Dublin Airport decide ‘lets cause as much chaos and inconvenience as possible’…and you know what, they succeed. At peak time for traveling, that is 6 pm on a Friday evening, the kind people at DublinAirport close the majority of their security gates, forcing every single person flying from the airport to queue in the one queue to get through airport security. I’m not sure if any of you have seen a queue with everybody from an international airport queing at the one time, rush hour time, well it’s long. Very long. An hour and 20 minutes long. So for all DAA’s recent advertising of its new terminal in Dublin Airport it’s failed its customers completely. That’s strike four, five, six, heck strike infinity! The queue was in a state of panic with every single member of it worrying they’d miss their flights and these were genuine concerns. Technically I missed mine. When I say that, I mean by the time I got through security, at an average rate of 16 times longer than what it should have taken, and eventually limped my way to my boarding gate it was closed. Thankfully I worked the pathetic look very well and convinced a member of staff to reopen the gate for me. I really did look pathetic.

So D.A.A you have a great marketing campaign at the moment advertising the opening of Dublin Airport’s second terminal. It’s an ad that captures our attention, it’s moving, makes us proud to be Irish, makes us proud of the airports achievements and is all in all a great campaign. However for all the singing of your own praises in said ad, could attention to your actual customers not have taken priority?

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdjLBXlieI0

I almost missed my flight and would not have been able to afford a new one. I’m sure dozens and dozens of passengers actually missed their flights last Friday and I don’t know how well they could have convinced men in security to reopen the gates for them. Like I said, I worked the pathetic look, I don’t know had I not been a 21 year old girl in a short skirt with a limp would those puppy eyes have gone down so well.

Having read this I hope you are feeling as much anger towards public transport as I am. Maybe it’s not every country, maybe Ireland has just excelled in its field of irritating passengers and if so, I take my hat off to you. You truly are professionals. 

If any readers want to share their horror stories please do. The ranting will make you feel better, and unlike your friends, I’ll be hearing your story for the first time so you can exaggerate as much as you like. Because as we all know, in regards to traveling, what a difference a day makes!